A Big Dog, An Ugly Woman, Two Shotguns And A Clawhammer
hot
violent
dog
buckweet
drink
gun
smoking
idiot
clawhammer
Story behind the song
Just a short tale about what happens when all the lawyers, repo men, ex-wives, Avon ladies, pissed off hookers, etc come knocking on my door.
Lyrics
(pre) I got a big dog
An ugly woman
Two shotguns and a clawhammer
An out of date can
Of pepper spray and
A looped soundbite of Piers Morgan
(chorus)
So f*** with me and I’ll f*** with you
It’s all that you’re getting ‘cos that’s all that I’ve got
F*** with me and I’ll f*** with you
Two smoking barrels and a tetanus shot
All of the lawyers with paternity suits
And restraining orders from Eliza Dushku
And summons by the dozen for libel and fraud
Cease and desist from the musos of course
The krishnas, the Dworkins, the repo men
The friends of the earth and the damn Mormons
I’m giving you a war-ning
Knocking on my door- brings
A chalk outline on a gravel drive
(pre) I got a big dog
An ugly woman
Two shotguns and a clawhammer
A plus six mace and
Boots of escaping
If you ring my bell I’ll Quad 4 you in the ass
(chorus)
So f*** with me and I’ll f*** with you
It’s all that you’re getting ‘cos that’s all that I’ve got
F*** with me and I’ll f*** with you
Two smoking barrels and a tetanus shot
If you’re on my property
For unpaid alimony
This will all be new to you if you’ve not seen misery
If you’re a hooker looking to
To cash in my IOU’s
Just turn away and start to pray I won’t catch up to you
‘cos
(pre) I got a big dog
An ugly woman
Two shotguns and a clawhammer
An out of date can
Of pepper spray and
A looped soundbite of Piers Morgan
(chorus)
So f*** with me and I’ll f*** with you
It’s all that you’re getting ‘cos that’s all that I’ve got
F*** with me and I’ll f*** with you
Two smoking barrels and a tetanus shot